DEVELOPING SUPERIOR PEOPLE SKILLS

By Peter Murphy
____________________________________________________________

1. Be persistent with style. You can get a lot more done atCB012366
work when you have the tenacity to deal with difficult
people without losing your cool. Never give up.

2. Exude a magnetic charm that makes people want to help
you. In stores and restaurants staff will go out of their
way to serve the few customers who know how to make them
feel special. The same applies at home and at work.

3. Have the courage to ask for more. When you are working
hard without getting the rewards you deserve you need to
stand up and be noticed. Successful people know the power of
asking.

4. Laugh at rejection. When you no longer worry about people
saying no to you, everything changes. You can talk to any
individual in authority as an equal, and stand up for
yourself with confidence.

5. Talk with clarity. Do this and people will know exactly
what you want – and give it to you. No more beating around
the bush.

6. Drop the need for approval. When you let go of the need
to be liked you are more likely to get it. This is one of
the great ironies of life.

7. Start conversations with confidence. This is a crucial
skill that opens doors socially and in business. When you do
this well you can expect greater success.

8. Become a great listener. As a result you will spot subtle
cues that tell you the key points in any negotiation. This
is valuable information that can help you drive a great
bargain.

9. Never be intimidated by others. When all your
communication is grounded in solid strategies that work you
will have a pervasive inner confidence and strength. You
will come across as someone to be respected and listened to.

10. Quickly deal with people problems. You can develop great
flexibility when it comes to resolving disagreements and
differences of opinion. This will save you lots of time and
heart ache.

11. Stop feeling self-conscious. Get clear about what you
really want. When you focus on that in a special way, your
attention will be on the other person. It then becomes
impossible to freeze because of nerves.

12. Master small talk. This allows you to build rapport with
anyone you meet and even make people eager to help you.
Think of all the interesting and wonderful people you will
meet.

Exceptional people skills can be learned. Find a proven
formula and follow it. YOu will be amazed at how quickly you
will progress.
____________________________________________________________

Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently
produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to
Developing Communication Confidence.

HAVING IT ALL MEANS LETTING IT GO

By Colleen Langenfeld
____________________________________________________________

I had a dream the other night.Newborn's Feet Cradled in Parent's Hand

I was Supermom. I had it all. Comfortable lifestyle, cute
kids, great husband.

And I felt trapped.

Huh?

In talking with other moms, I learn this feeling is the norm
more than the exception. We want it all, but don’t have our
own personal definition of ‘all’. Which is a problem. If
we’re achieving based on others’ expectations, we’re bound
to come to a time of disappointment. On the other hand,
genuinely discovering our own journey is time-expensive and
not backed by some sort of cosmic guarantee!

A wise woman once said to me that when you hang on so tight
you’re squeezing, things are slipping through your fingers
anyway. Hm.

Have you ever wondered what would happen if you just let go?

Let go of…

– perfectionism.
– keeping up.
– being right all the time.
– a particular body image.
– the illusion of total time control.

Now, please hear what I’m NOT saying.

– I’m not saying to stop being responsible.
– I’m not saying to stop planning, goal getting and
achieving.
– And I’m absolutely not saying to stop dreaming!

But after we plan and consequently set our plans in motion,
I think we need to do a reality check.

– Toddlers often don’t potty-train on schedule.
– Teenagers aren’t always interested in bonding during our
appointed ‘quality time’.
– Husbands often have schedules (and ideas) of their own.
– The car rarely breaks down when you DON’T need it.
– Our career planning makes sense on paper, but classes
three nights a week for two years plus fulltime work and
raising a family can choke the life out of anybody!

Letting go is about getting a firm grip on our expectations
and being flexible even when life goes careening out of
control. It’s about understanding that time management is a
tool and a guideline, not a straitjacket. Most importantly,
letting go is about building reality into our life dreams.
For example…

We can pad our schedules with extra time for the daily
adventures of life or we can be continually stressed. Our
choice.

We can DECIDE what success means to each of us individually
and set our sights accordingly, stubbornly refusing to
settle for someone else’s version of happiness.

We can accept that we get 24 hours each day to…make things
happen, laugh a little, love a lot, and learn to know when
to call it a day.

What am I really saying? That we can learn how to focus on
what truly counts for each of us, plan our energies
accordingly, and then enjoy the fruits and near-fruits of
our labors. We may find that our dreams will be a bit
tempered and our actual days will soar with astonishing
accomplishment.

And maybe even…joy.

Copyright Colleen Langenfeld 2004
____________________________________________________________

Colleen Langenfeld offers helpful ideas to busy working
moms. Use our resources at http://www.paintedgold.com to
make your life feel easier, healthier, and smarter now!

EXTRAORDINARY PEOPLE… IN MEDIOCRE TIMES

By Edward B. Toupin
____________________________________________________________

My grandfather used to speak of the days when people drovej0438847
the world. It was a time when people were proud to
contribute and move society and industry forward at full
steam. But, people were proud of themselves! However, before
he died, one of his observations was that “we have come to
mediocre times.”

I was a bit appalled at that statement because, to me, these
times were the epitome of existence! However, over the
years, I began to see what he meant. It is not so much that
our advances are mediocre, but it is the state of humanity
and society that has become mediocre in comparison. Yet, we
don’t see it as such because we live in these times daily
and have no real comparison.

In these times, people lose hope. While I agree that, many
times, circumstances are to blame for a particular
situation; however, we allow such circumstances to overpower
us. We need to take control and decide which circumstances
are to be allowed into our lives.

In today’s environment, there are only a handful of
individuals that move the society forward and so many people
simply follow. Perhaps the difficulties, stresses, and
complications around us have turned many of us into
“mediocre people” in extraordinary times. It depends on how
you look at it all! But, indeed, this is not the case.

When all need a hero, a hero is not to be found. That is
when the best hero we can have is ourselves. That may sound
arrogant, but who would you rather be like: a better you, or
someone else who might be where you think you want to be,
but may have myriad other problems with which you would have
to contend. Deal with your own and become the better you!

We are all extraordinary and we all have something unique
and phenomenal to contribute. However, we must learn to
contribute to ourselves, first, and then consider the
contribution to the world around you. It is how you see and
feel about yourself that reflects upon and influences your
environment and society. Turn inward and exalt the
extraordinary you. Learn that the odd little nuances of life
are there to strengthen you to create “extraordinary times.”

Copyright 2004 Edward B. Toupin, All Rights Reserved.
____________________________________________________________

Edward B. Toupin is an author, life-strategy coach,
counselor, Reiki Master, technical writer, and PhD Candidate
living in Las Vegas, NV. Among other things, he authors
books, articles, and screenplays on topics ranging from
career success through life organization and fulfillment.
Check out some of his recent print and electronic books as
well as his articles covering various life-changing topics.
For more information, e-mail Edward at etoupin@toupin.com or
visit his site at http://www.make-life-great.com or
http://www.toupin.com
_______________________

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